Lazy summer days... I am blessed to be able to stay home with the kids and spend time with them while they're still young. And I'm thankful that they're able to take care of themselves pretty much (my diaper days are done for now, hallelujah).
As I think of ways to keep them occupied, I contemplate my life. I often think of myself as a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants kind of girl who is sometimes capable of moments of planned organization. Routines and schedules, while I like them when I follow them, don't often stay long when I'm in charge of implementing and maintaining them.
I have moments of clarity and forethought, like when I thought of having the boys learn to cook by taking charge of one meal a day once a week. My 15-year-old made a really lovely baked fondue from the Good Housekeeping cook book. There's hope that he'll take after his dad in the cooking department.
Overall, though, I go through many of my days without much of a plan or routine. While that's good for spur-of-the-moment things, I can't help but feel that it's merely drifting through life. Yes, living life moment-by-moment can be some people's ideal, especially those who are trapped in the past or worried about the future. But moderation in all things, right?
So I envy those who have discipline in their lives; those who have a plan and know that they're doing something to accomplish it. And I think that as we learn discipline and forethought in our lives, we build on it with each year that we're on this earth. We teach it to our children, consciously or unconsciously. Then they learn and pass it on to their children, and the legacy builds with each generation.
Some families who've started this process sooner and have learned to effectively pass it on build up a tremendous family legacy that is obvious in the descendants. You see it in the way they ARE; gracious, kind, loving, thoughtful, disciplined.
That's one kind of legacy; the one I aspire to. Other legacies are not so enviable, of course, and there's always the possibility that one generation goes horribly wrong in a long line of honorable ancestors. And while it's vital that we pass on what we've learned to our kids and build good habits and disciplines in ourselves and teach them to our kids, we will also pass on those not-so-good habits and idiosyncrasies that make us slap ourselves on the forehead in frustration.
My hope is that the legacy I'm passing on right now won't mess my kids up too much. But I still have a little time left; I pray that I'll make good use of that time, and keep learning myself how to live a worthy life that they'll want to emulate, especially during these lazy summer days.
I know that I'm not perfect (God sure knows that), and my kids are not an extension of me, so I'll not put myself under that kind of pressure. But I can do all that I am able to pass on a legacy worthy of envy.
What legacy are you passing on? Share your wisdom with me and I will thank you from the bottom of my heart!
First of all; your diaper days are done..."for now"? What does that mean, I wonder...
ReplyDeleteI think all children, as they grow into adulthood, become a mixture of what was (their parents and relatives they see often) and what will be (their friends and other influential people). The proportions of that mixture depend on the strengths of the two sides, but it's always a mixture.
That's why no parent can take either all the credit or all the blame for what a child becomes as an adult.
I worry a lot about the things that can influence our children outside of our family because I don't have much control over it. But we do talk about those things so that we can at least feel like we have a finger on the pulse of what those outside influences are.
I try to remind myself that, try as we might to be great parents and excellent role models, we are not perfect, and it is entirely possible that some of those outside influences might actually be good for the children, even if we are not always entirely comfortable with them.
my diaper days are done until my grandkids start arriving.... thanks for your thoughts, randy. you and michelle seem to be doing many things right with your three.
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